I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
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