Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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