apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
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