YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
This toilet bowl is my home.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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