i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize