Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
