Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
