I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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