It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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