It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Enjoy the penises
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
