CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize