remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I love you. Go after that dick
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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