we have officially lost it.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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