You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
