Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
