5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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