you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Randomize
