He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
