He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
