Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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