You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
