now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
