i don't plan on having that self control this summer
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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