What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
