this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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