McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
