Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
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