4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
420 ftw
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
