How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
