My brain says no but my pants say off.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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