ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
