Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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