Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
