My underwear smells like fireworks.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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