soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
