My hand turned me down
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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