You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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