Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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