Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
