who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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