I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
