I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
