Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
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