Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
