I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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