you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
