What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
