I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
He told me they were just razor bumps!
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
