I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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