told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Even my vagina gasped.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
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