Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
