we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Randomize
