thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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